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Scott Gary Michael
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Scott Gary Michael

cigarettes and chocolate milk
these are just a couple of my cravings
everything it seems i like's a little bit stronger
a little bit thicker
a little bit harmful for me

if i should buy jellybeans
have to eat them all in just one sitting
everything it seems i like's a little bit sweeter
a little bit fatter
a little bit harmful for me

and then there's those other things
which for several reasons we won't mention
everything about them is a little bit stranger
a little bit harder
a little bit deadly

it isn't very smart
tends to make one part so broken-hearted

sitting here remembering me
always been a shoe made for the city
go ahead, accuse me of just singing about places
with scrappy boys faces
have general run of the town
playing with prodigal songs
takes a lot of sentimental valiums
can't expect the world to be your raggedy andy
while running on empty
you little old doll with a frown

you got to keep in the game
maintaining mystique while facing forward
i suggest a reading of 'a lesson in tightropes'
or 'surfing your high hopes' or 'adios kansas'

it isn't very smart
tends to make one part so broken-hearted

still there's not a show on my back
holes or a friendly intervention
i'm just a little bit heiress, a little bit irish
a little bit tower of pisa whenever i see you
so please be kind if i'm a mess
cigarettes and chocolate milk

About Scott
Scott Gary Michael is not anyone special. In fact, he wanted a normal job but somehow his friendship with his grandfather Creed Bratton roped him into getting a temp job at Dunder-Mifflin of Scranton, Pennsylvania. He's never met his father, but he knows he shares his name with him. His mother, Katrina Bratton, used to sell herself for money, but has resigned herself strictly to being a carny. He tells no one.

He smokes and he collects smooshed pennies on railroad tracks. He's never been a bad boy. He's never been a straight A student and he's never planted a tree with the expectation it'll grow, but soon he will do all three.

Really. At least that's what she said.

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Scott is an original character in The Office fandom. I'm not affliated with anyone including Jason Dohring.